Below are some of the votes and comments submitted by readers who took last month's survey.
Kirk Crane - Augusta, GA
Voted for:
Modern Increases in Natural Disasters
Reason: OK, maybe this isn't a whole sermon most of the time, but STOP
using this point as evidence that the end is around the corner!!! Has
it ever occurred to any pastor that there is probably a modern increase
in natural disaster detecting equipment, too?!
Ryan Pollock - Salina, KS
Voted for:
Any series on the family
Reason: I'm a 24-year-old single college student. And don't give me any
of that, "This stuff is important for you singles out there too,
because one day you'll be married" crap.
Lisa - Rochester, NY
Voted for:
5 Steps to a Better Prayer Life
Reason: Especially when it includes lame things like 'find a quiet place'
and 'pray every morning at 6am' but doesn't actually give any examples
of how to pray from scripture. Like, oh I don't know, THE LORD'S PRAYER.
Kathy Black - Gilroy, CA
Voted for:
Middle East Prophecy Update
Reason: We know - a firecracker went off in Israel, Russia's invading,
Rapture, Antichrist, blah, blah, blah...
Stacie Kramer - Bend, OR
Voted for:
Sex
Reason: Our youth leader gives us this sermon, like, every three weeks.
If he weren't so cute, I'd leave the youth group.
Clair Voyant - Delphi, WV
Voted for:
Postmodernism
Reason: Let's work this out together, shall we? If modern means 'characteristic
of the present time' (Random House), and 'post' is a prefix meaning 'after
or later than' (still Random House); then logically postmodern means:
'after or later than the present time'. Now bounce this off the definition
of the word 'future': That which will exist any time after the present
(Webster. Page missing in my Random House dictionary.) How strange! They
sound like the same definition! And sermons about the future should be
left to the eschatologists (no definition necessary for Good Christians),
not my hack local pastor! Thank you very much.
Jordan Walsh - Erie, PA
Voted for:
John 11:35
Reason: Oooh, you're so clever. You can build a whole sermon around two
words. I'm REALLY impressed!
Dennis Russell - Rochester NY
Voted for:
Free-Will Theism
Reason: Come on isn't it obvious. If anyone with half a brain cell took
even the slightest intellectual look at the Bible they would see that
Predestination is the truth. I mean the Holy Bible is so clear that we
have nothing to say about what happens in this life. God has decided everything
we are just mere puppets on a string having our chains yanked by the Master
Puppeteer. I just wish people would stop twisting Holy Scripture to form
to their own biases. Is it too much to ask for everyone to 'Come Together',
recognize Calvin as the Saint he is and Wesley as the damned heretic he
is, who is currently burning in hell along with Pelagius.
Jo Ann Ross - Birmingham, AL
Voted for:
Stewardship
Reason: If I have to hear that Lexus-driving pastor tell me I need to
give him money one more time, I think I'll scream!
Dax - Mississuaga, Ontario
Voted for:
What Is Love Really, And Why You Shouldn't Date
Reason: I swear the spirit of Joshua Harris has come upon our preacher,
but the last time I asked a girl out, I didn't say "I'm ready to
make a life commitment to you, and to father your children, but not get
emotionally or physically involved until marriage. You in?"
Kt - Porterville
Voted for:
Love
Reason: OK do we have to do the Agape, Eros, Phileo, thing over and over,
no more please.
Trinity - Rochester, NY
Voted for:
Tithing/Stewardship
Reason: Because if God created the universe. What does he need with my
money? He can make his own. Now if I was getting a good service, some
rocking tunes and it was in a bar, I would pay for it, but the church
pastors are just greedy.
Summer - Melbourne, FL
Voted for:
This generation is worse than all the ones that came before
Reason: Yes, because the Inquisition, slavery, witch hunting and the sub-humanization
of women weren't bad at ALL.
Sam Long - Bristol, TN
Voted for:
The End Times
Reason: Brittany Spears is the anti-Christ - what else needs to be said?
Jen Hall - Winston, NC
Voted for:
Drinking
Reason: One time my pastor went on and on about how I shouldn't drink
and how playing quarters is against God's law and how I was throwing my
life away and how I had no discipline or respect and how I would get kicked
out of the house if I didn't start.... oh, wait, that was my mom when
I was in middle school.
Larry Picket - Lovelock, NV
Voted for:
Any Mother's Day Sermon
Reason: Yes, we all know how important moms are. And yes, we know that
there are many godly moms in the Bible. No, we don't want you to hand
us another one of those corny 'honey-do' sticks that moms/wives can use
on Mother's day to tell us what to do.
Beth Barton - Page, AZ
Voted for:
Money
Reason: I once visited a church and heard a sermon that went on about
all the improvements that they had made to the church and all the nifty
stuff they had (like a grand piano). Then they asked for more money. Yeah,
right. Go get a god.
Cheryl Allen - Salt Lake City, UT
Voted for:
Mormons
Reason: My uncle is a Mormon, and he doesn't hate black people or have
7 wives...Lay off!
Peter, Paul, and Mary
Voted for:
Anything from the Old Testament
Reason: We hate that 'Old School' way of thinking. Besides, those books
are too long. With our ADHD, we can only concentrate on shorter sermons
like the ones from 3rd John. That gives us less time to forget what we
are going to order at Applebee's and we get there ahead of all those who
listened to a longer sermon. Isn't the New Testament new and improved
anyways? Who needs to hear of those 10 commandments and the law over and
over again?
Wally Frist - New Haven, CT
Voted for:
New Age/Occult
Reason: If I didn't have a brain, I might actually be led to believe that
listening to Yanni was sinful. It's not sinful...it's just kinda stupid.
The Red Bearded Pianist - Chesapeake, VA
Voted for:
Youth Missions
Reason: I have no problem with giving to missions, and in fact, that is
my point. No one needs to be convinced that missions are important. We
get it, already. We always have. And the worst thing is that we always
end up watching those camp videos with the rope courses and water sports;
you know, like, 'Son River Valley Adventure!' or something, with the
bad camera work, overbearing music and bizarre closeups of the fat kid
who needs to pull his pants up. I can't stand it!
Rick Presley - Marengo, OH
Voted for:
Tithing
Reason: My money is my own business. The church has no business asking
for it.
Angel Suarez - El Paso, TX
Voted for:
Infant Baptism
Reason: Yeah, cuz that should be a sermon!
Adam Congdon - Rochester, NY
Voted for:
End Times
Reason: He will get here when He gets here, lets not obsess over when
it'll be! Besides, it's been the Last Days for like 2000 years now.
Sarah Hammond - Payson, UT
Voted for:
Prayer
Reason: Well I guess I'm not against this sermon topic in theory, but
will someone give a GOOD sermon on prayer!?!? I've heard enough "if
you don't pray God can't do things" crap!
Theresa Ford
Voted for:
Gleanings From Leviticus
Reason:
Helen Thomas - Battle Creek, MI
Voted for:
Stewardship
Reason: Yeah, we know, we know. Everything we have is God's, and we need
to give as an act of worship. Blah, blah, blah. How about a sermon about
not guilting your congregation into giving for a change?
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